My name is Kim Hawkins from Mahwah, NJ, USA. Called to addiction recovery ministry, I am a student at Christian Leaders Institute (Learn more about studying the Bible and ministry classes online, Click Here).
I live with my husband Curtis and our two cats, Zoe and Zion. Curtis is my second husband. Together, we have seven children. Three of the seven were raised by us. The oldest lives in Florida, the middle is in the Navy stationed in San Diego, and the youngest is in the Air Force stationed in Vermont. We also have five grandchildren: Sebastian (9), Noah (4), Milo (4), Aminah, aka “The Princess” (1), and Zaire (1). We plan to retire this year and relocate to Florida.
My Story
I grew up in Connecticut, an only child in a middle-class family. Being an only child had advantages and disadvantages. Yes, I often got whatever I wanted and didn’t have to share. But I was also very lonely. I didn’t have a lot of friends. Either I was constantly “teased” (now called “bullied”) for my glasses or not liked because I had the latest clothes, shoes, music, toys, etc. It caused me always to want people to like me, so I did whatever I could to fit in and be liked.
My mother grew up Baptist and took me to church every Sunday. I served on the youth usher board, the youth choir, and the youth missionary team. I wasn’t baptized as a child and didn’t know who God was. There was no relationship with God, just religion. I learned to do what I should do in church and at home. I got good grades, was respectful, and followed the rules to hide my drug usage.
My Addiction Journey
I continued hiding when I left home for college. But, I did not finish college and couldn’t keep a job. However, I never attributed this behavior to my drug usage. Of course, the drug usage progressed over the years, and so did the type of drug I used. I married someone I knew for only ten days and later found out he was also a user. We relocated because of our addictions but eventually had to return to Connecticut to my parents because of the habit.
We lost two children to ectopic pregnancies, and then our addiction heightened. I later became pregnant with my oldest son after being told I would never have children. Any average person would have been excited and rejoiced over the miracle. Not me. I was angry and annoyed. Because I had to stop using drugs. A year later, I was pregnant with my second son. This time I could not stop using it. I used my entire pregnancy. However, by the grace of God, he was drug-free at birth. Soon after, my husband left, and we divorced.
Freedom In Christ Jesus
I went to rehab twice after he left but could not stay clean. I hated myself, burdened with guilt because I loved my children. However, they weren’t enough for me to stop using them. I was in so much emotional pain, despair, and hopelessness. I wanted to end my life. The night I was planning to attempt suicide, I received a phone call from a friend of a friend. He told me that the Holy Spirit had told him to call me. He ended up talking to me for hours. The next day, I went to a two-day detox and then an outpatient program for women with a daycare program. I was in this program for over a year. During that year, I attended meetings every day, sometimes 2-3 times a day.
Also, during this time, I longed to be back in the church. I found a Bible-based church and began to know and acknowledge that my higher power was my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Now, I had a relationship with Him. I began to see how He was always there, working in my life even when I was using. The Word of God began to speak to my life. Living life on life’s terms, according to the program, began to mean something entirely different to me. Therefore, I stopped going to meetings.
My Calling Journey
I went through a period where I felt God would not leave me alone. Many told me that God was calling me to addiction recovery ministry. God would wake me up in the middle of the night. I felt this pull, sensing He was calling me. However, I felt unworthy of God to use me. I would think something or read something or hear something in the Spirit. God would confirm that it was He. He was training me to listen to Him and be sure it was Him.
I also heard the Pastor say that those called by God love God’s Word. However, as much as I loved God, I thought I didn’t have that. I wasn’t obedient to everything in the Bible. I didn’t want to be in God’s Word all the time. Therefore, I discounted myself. I ran for a long time, but God kept drawing and calling me.
Finding Christian Leaders
I have been at my job at the college for 19 years. Our Counseling Department received a grant to start a recovery program a few months ago. They asked me to share my story. God’s timing is truly amazing because I spoke one week before I celebrated 30 years of being delivered from cocaine and crack. Then I realized that this was my ministry. God told me that I needed education in addiction recovery ministry for this calling. So, I began searching online for Christian programs for recovery. I found Christian Leaders. It is not a coincidence that I am here at Christian Leaders Institute for addiction recovery ministry training. It is God’s divine plan and will for my life.
Like the Apostle Paul, I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes. Instead, I walk in the confidence, humility, and power of my Lord and Savior. I am his mouthpiece, a humble and willing vessel.
Register a Study Account
Register for a free study account that automatically enrolls you in the Getting Started Class at the Christian Leaders Learning Platform. The Getting Started class will take you less than an hour to complete.
When you log in to the Learning Platform, you will notice that the Getting Started Class automatically appears on your dashboard.
The Getting Started Class will orientate you to the Christian Leaders Learning Platform and the Programs offered, including:
- Ministry Awards, Certificates, and Diplomas with the Christian Leaders Institute.
- College Degrees with the CLI’s Leadership Excellence School.
- Minister Credentialling (Ordination) with the Christian Leaders Alliance, including local Soul Center registration possibilities.
Note: You can enroll in tuition-free courses or mini-courses immediately without finishing the getting started class.
Find out more about women in ministry here
Ministry Calling Story
My name is C. Vincent “Vince” Frazier. I am from the United States of America. I am taking ministry classes online at the Christian Leaders Institute (Learn more about studying the Bible and ministry classes online, Click Here).
My Early Years
I was born in the United States of America, in Jonesboro, Arkansas. My mother was a nominal Catholic and separated from my birth father shortly after my birth. So, I had a little exposure to Catholicism from my mom. However, she was never serious about her religion, so neither was I. So, essentially, I grew up with no actual Christian teaching.
My mom remarried when I was about five years old. After that marriage, I gained a stepfather, three brothers, and a sister. My stepfather was a mechanic and always thought our place was not as good as elsewhere. So, as I grew up, we moved many times and lived in 13 different states. Somehow, I graduated from high school despite all the moves.
Air Force Journey
At 18 years old, after graduation, I joined the Air Force. It’s funny how God orchestrates life events. After entering the Air Force, I went home on leave before being sent overseas. While home, I decided to go roller skating with friends. The guy who owned the skating rink offered free popcorn and a movie for those willing to hang out. We decided to stay. Though I remember little about the film, I did note that it was a Christian movie where the gospel was presented at the end. At the time, it seemed to have little impact on me. So, I ignored the gospel invitation. However, a tiny spiritual seed was planted.
My first duty station in the Air Force was overseas in England, working in the intelligence area. Outside of work, I was like most of the guys away from home for the first time. We all went to the base club/bar to pick up the girls during our time off. During one of those bar visits, I looked at the party around me and became dissatisfied with my life. I felt sorry for many of the people. During that moment of self-reflection, I realized I was one of those I felt sorry for. So, I decided I wanted something more to life, but the question was how to make that happen.
Religious Exploration Journey
My initial thought was that perhaps religion held some answers for me. So, I decided to start investigating religion. I developed a plan. I planned to give each religion one month of serious examination. Then move on to the next one until I found the answers I sought about life. The first question was, which religion to start with? That’s when that tiny seed planted in a Michigan roller skating rink bore fruit. I remembered the movie about Christians, so I decided to begin there.
I asked around if anyone knew some Christians. A couple of guys told me about a Bible study that met on the base once a week. So, I showed up uninvited to the Bible study. When asked why I came, I told them I was investigating religion, and Christianity was first on my list. I told them I planned to give one month to Christianity before I moved on to the next belief. Then, I said, for that month, I would do anything they did to gain a complete understanding of what Christians were all about.
So began my month. They told me they went to a singles fellowship on Friday nights. I said I would go. Then, they told me they drove 45 minutes from the base to attend a little Baptist church. Again, I said I would go. They also did some other volunteer things, and I said I would go to anything they asked me to if I were not working.
Continued Exploration of Christianity
The month went by quickly. The fellowship was fun, the church was exciting, and it became apparent that they had something I did not. But, despite them explaining the gospel to me several times and hearing it in church, I could not take the final step of relinquishing my life to God.
On the last day, I went to my final singles fellowship meeting. I left the group meeting and sat by myself in the dining room. The host family had a little girl about 12 years old. She came into the room and looked at me. Finally, she spoke, “So, have you accepted Jesus yet?” I said, “No.” She looked at me again, thought a minute, then said, “Why not? It’s so easy!” Then she left the room. I sat there in frustration, thinking, “How could it be “easy” but so hard for me?”
The next day was Saturday, and that night I went to a bar to consider what my “religion” would be. As I sat there, I became increasingly frustrated by my lack of progress. Finally, I couldn’t stay there any longer, so I went for a walk. It was a dark evening, but clear with no rain in “rainy” England. So, I walked. I thought more and more about why I could accept what the little girl had said was so easy.
Changed in Jesus Christ
I realized I wanted to completely understand God before accepting what He said. It was giving up control without knowing to whom I was giving it. Then, I thought a little more and realized that if God was the God of the universe, He knew everything. I pondered the fact that I was a finite human being. So, I could never fully understand a being with infinite knowledge. I then realized I would have to accept what he had done and trust Him to care for the rest. So, all by my lonesome on a base in England, I acknowledged my sin, asked His forgiveness for my sin and pride, and accepted the work that Jesus had done on the cross.
Back in my dorm room, I talked with my roommate, who was not a Christian. I told him what I had done; my roommate decided he also wanted to accept Christ. So, he prayed, and after that, everything changed. We shared with others and attended Bible study and church. Our little group multiplied. We started a children’s Bible club downtown, went to London to run services for the mission, and gave out tracts on the streets of London. I even preached a sermon at the little church we attended. We also were pulled into a Navigators organization Bible study. There, we received solid teaching on the Bible. Between the discipleship training of the Navigators and our very active Christian service, we gained a firm foundation of faith for the future.
Marriage and Mission Service
After returning to the states, I joined a local church. There, I met and married my wife. God immediately gave us an assignment overseas. There, we grew and served in a small mission church for the Japanese. From there, we had several other missions. God also made clear to me that my spiritual gift was teaching.
I have had the opportunity to continue serving by teaching in multiple churches. As a teacher, I’ve written and conducted various Bible studies, led several Sunday School classes, and served as a Camp Director for a family camp. I also gained a local license to preach, allowing me to preach numerous times. God has been gracious in granting me these many opportunities to serve.
Need for Ministry Training Classes Online
Still, serving in many different ministries along life’s path, I realized that there is still so much to learn about God’s Word, the Bible. While I have a Bachelor’s degree in Mathematics and a Master’s degree in business, that education never filled in the gaps I have in ministry training. God impressed me with the need to be a life-long learner by seeking more knowledge and skills in ministry.
My learning journey with the Christian Leaders Institute began when I needed the training to perform a wedding for a lifelong friend’s family. As I looked online for options to get certified to perform a wedding, I found CLI. I enjoyed the ministry classes online. I also found that CLI offered many other ministry options to help me grow as a minister. So, I’m taking ministry classes online with CLI to get the licensed minister certificate.
Interesting how God works! He started with a guy who knew nothing about God or Christ and took him to a roller-skating rink to expose him to the gospel. Then, God used a little girl to let a young Air Force man know that accepting Christ is easy if you can get that God can never be fully understood and can be trusted for salvation through His Son. He then blesses me with a wonderful Christian wife and many opportunities to serve Him.
I’m unsure what to do once I complete the licensed minister certification. However, I know that the same God I trusted many years ago does know what He wants of me in the future. So my job is to prepare and be content in knowing that whatever happens in the future is in His trustworthy hands.
Register a Study Account
Register for a free study account that automatically enrolls you in the Getting Started Class at the Christian Leaders Learning Platform. The Getting Started class will take you less than an hour to complete.
When you log in to the Learning Platform, you will notice that the Getting Started Class automatically appears on your dashboard.
The Getting Started Class will orientate you to the Christian Leaders Learning Platform and the Programs offered, including:
- Ministry Awards, Certificates, and Diplomas with the Christian Leaders Institute.
- College Degrees with the CLI’s Leadership Excellence School.
- Minister Credentialling (Ordination) with the Christian Leaders Alliance, including local Soul Center registration possibilities.
Note: You can enroll in tuition-free courses or mini-courses immediately without finishing the getting started class.